Texas Hold’em, Annoying Friends and a Side Bet on LeBron

So, last night was poker night and in the spirit of gambling, we take numerous opportunities to side bet anything and everything.

A pocket full of 20’s is a requirement to get into the action. No one makes change and the bets are always in multiples of 20, like the buy-in at the table. If there wasn’t anything to bet on, we would just play the serial numbers on the front of Andrew Jackson.

The barn on my buddy John’s property we play in looks more like a ski lodge than a poker room; fireplace, leather couches and all the trimmings. Every time I play cards with these guys, we have the 100 inch plus screen rolled down with some sort of game on.

Noticing out of the corner of my left eye that Orlando and Boston had less than 2 minutes to play, I looked to my left and said, “You wanna bet on the finish of this game?”

Now, you have to know the guy to my left I was asking.

Let me describe him briefly. He is a physician by trade and in the latter part of his career. He loves to argue over just about anything that exists. His famous line of “that’s not the point” annoys everyone listening, but we all still like him. Let’s call him Jack for all intensive purposes. That’s short for Jack (fill in the blank)!

Always the loudest guy at the table, you never lose track of where the blinds are when Jack is playing. No buttons necessary, just forget to blind up and you will hear it as soon as the first card drops out of the dealer’s hand.

I have known Jack for several years, but in the last two years have seen him on a regular basis because he is good friends with John.

If a card drops on the floor and the players at the table can’t see it, Jack would want to throw down a 20 and ask, “Who wants to bet that card landed right side up?”

So, my asking for a bet on the end of the Orlando Magic versus Boston Celtics game was accepted before I could hardly utter the word “bet”. Knowing that he loathes Stan Van Gundy made my selection of the Magic even easier.

Orlando was up by 3 points and since time was a factor, Jack said, “I’ll take Boston, but you gotta give me at least a point.” I didn’t hesitate knowing the Magic had the lead.

With 15 seconds left to go, I lifted the cash off the table and heard him groan, “It figures I hexed them.” Final score a 7 point victory for me(remember I gave him 1 point), 83-75. Beautiful!

This eased the fact I had already been knocked out of the first game of poker without re-buying and had lost a 20 spot about 5 minutes earlier on a side bet of whose hand would win in a four way heads-up showdown. No surprise, Jack was in on this one and bet on two of the hands. He lost that bet too! Last night just didn’t seem like Jack’s night.

With the Celtics tied in the series, Jack is getting a little upset. Mad, partly because of “the moron” Van Gundy, as he sees it and also because of a bet he made with me at the beginning of the season. The wager was made at poker when the Cleveland Cavaliers acquired Mo Williams.

I asked the 12 guys sitting at the table that night, what they thought of the acquisition? He immediately fired up with one of his Jackisms, “It isn’t gonna matter who they pick up, they suck anyways.” I took offense to this being a huge Cavs fan.

The old saying is “put your money where your mouth is.” So I asked, “You want to put $500 on that ridiculous statement?”

Jack rarely turns down the opportunity to show you “what the point is.”

He yells out, “I’ll bet you $5000 to your $500 that the Cavaliers won’t win the title this year.” He then starts laughing like he is the all knowing Jack someone tells to pipe down at least two times a night when we play.

LeBron James plays for the Cavs and I felt then the same way I do now, no championship this year and LeBron will bail when his contract ends. This will be the death of the Cavaliers franchise. They have to win.

I was going to take the bet $500 straight up, but now I am getting 10-1 odds. Not bad.

Poker night ended well for me and okay for Jack as I won the second game after 2 re-buys and he finished second. He re-bought twice near the end of the game when he busted out, after the table was down from the original 9 players to 4. He and I took more chances than the rest of the table, but it ended up working out for both of us. Jack left the barn losing less money than he would have, complaining that he would be awake another two hours watching the Los Angeles Lakers and Houston Rockets.

Jack also has a bet that the Denver Nuggets will be playing Cleveland in the NBA Finals.

Winning that bet or the bet against me is “not the point.”

The point, according to Jack, “has nothing to do with money and everything to do with pride.”

I was proud of both of my victories over Jack and winning the majority of the $20 bills that left the poker table last night.

Here’s hoping the Cavaliers win the NBA title and I get $5000 worth of pride!

photo: AP